The Mirror Has Two Faces

Do you ever feel like you’ve lost that battle?

They tell you to keep fighting on,

Never give up,

But for what?

I feel defeat sinking over me like a heavy weight.

I feel the breath in my chest struggle as I hesitate.

Hold on or let go?

I’m so certain that I don’t know.

I’m confused by him and his double meanings

Does he love me? Or am I just over thinking?

It’d be so powerful for him to finally say

That he apologizes for all the pain he’s delivered our way

But I don’t think he knows nor will he ever;

That when family says we love you, we mean forever.

I feel this grief in my heart, 

What I thought I had lost I finally found; only to realize we’re still far apart.

I kicked and I screamed then I sat down and cried

Because every time I see him I feel like he died.

He’s gone, this kid with so much promise.

His eyes are vacant his words not honest.

I hurt knowing that I must have let him down

Let him take his pills and in his alcohol he’ll drown.


What Never Once Was

IMG_1532You never said you love me

You never said you’ll stay

You never promised me tomorrow

Or begged for yesterday

You’ve never brought me sorrow

I’ve never cared anyway

We never held hands

And we never touched lips

We never grazed fingertips

We never thought of our future

We never dreamt of one

I never wanted kids, you might have wanted some

I told you not to stay

And you were ok with walking away

I held the door for you as we said goodbye

Neither one of us sad, nor with tears in our eyes